Suspicious Minds

You remember the Elvis song from years ago called "Suspicious Minds" (I actually prefer the Fine Young Cannibals version of the song, but that's neither here nor there). The song depicts the often realized scenario of one partner suspecting the other partner of being dishonest and/or cheating. It's funny, and maybe it's just me, but every time I hear that song I still tend to believe that the guy has previously done something to warrant his current plight. And regardless of his explanations and current angst, I still can't bring myself to fully believe he can be completely trusted.

One of the definitions of "suspicion" is "the imagining of something without evidence." Even the definition of the term tends to play on our emotions and almost immediately makes our minds leap ahead to what suspected offense could have been perpetrated. But if you think about it, more often than not, "suspicion" really says more about the "one being suspicious" than it does about the "one being suspected" of something. There is nothing in this Elvis song that leads you to believe that the guy has ever done anything to create suspicion, and even though he is in turmoil by the effects the suspicion has on his relationship with his companion, I would venture to guess that the one in greater anguish here is the girl. She cannot seem to control her emotions and thought processes, and most probably sits and stews thinking of every possible negative scenario of what the guy might be up to creating her own personal torture chamber in which she now is prisoner.

There are many insidious aspects of "suspicion". One, it plays on our tendencies to expect the worst. Suspicion is one of the few instances I can think of where the mind and the emotions team up for "ill" (evil?), and send us spiraling downward into a quagmire of miserable speculation. Most of the time we are either too emotional and need sound thinking to get us beyond our emotions, or we are lost in cold calculated thinking needing emotion to bring heartfelt perspective to our rationale. But suspicion seems to feed upon the sinful nature of both heart and mind.

Lastly, there is Satan. The Evil One lies in wait. As if our own sinful tendencies were not enough, the Deceiver is ready and willing to tell us lies to feed our suspicions with the intent to cause massive harm.

Christians and Suspicions

Believe me, I have seen it! And it is not a pretty sight! Half truths mixed with half lies mixed with legitimate concern mixed with hurtful responses mixed with good intentions mixed with....and before you know it, the well known song it "Only Takes a Spark, To Keep the Fire Goin'" turns into "It Only Takes a Spark, To Keep the Fire Blazin' Outta Control" and your entire church is burned to the ground. I witnessed it in the church in which I grew up (we tended to have brush fires regularly). As I stated before, it was a hellfire and brimstone preaching church. I wasn't afraid of the fires of hell nearly as much as I was afraid of the fires of suspicion and mistrust that were destroying our church at that time. And, again, Satan is just waiting to jump into the fray and fan the flames.

What I Don't Know

Even the most mature Christians can fall prey to suspicion. I now find myself (I guess I should have said least mature) in a situation where I am fighting suspicion with every bone in my body. I have enough information to be dangerous to myself and others, but I do not have the entire story. And I never will. Every bit of information I receive from trusted friends entails some truths mixed with emotional perspectives which are meant to convey truth, but still are "intended truths" tainted by suspicions and emotion. Indeed, it could not be any other way! We are human beings. There is objective truth, but only God knows the truth and God will be the only one to ever know it. I fully believe now that if I tried to gather more information to try and completely understand this situation that the waters would only continue to get muddier and my suspicions would become greater and greater. So I sit straddling the wall of objectivity trying not to be blown off either side by the winds of suspicion. I get some information and I am blown in one direction. I get more information and I am quickly blown in the other direction. I become suspicious and begin to think the worst of people on whichever side of the wall I find myself. I must find a way to stay on top of the wall so that I can remain objective. Or must I?

What I Need To Know

I don't see anything in Scripture that tells me that I must be completely informed on everything. But I do see this - "Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind that you prove what is the will of God." (Romans 12:2). OK, let's refocus here. Let's renew the mind through the Spirit to control the emotions. Let's let the Spirit melt our heart of stone with the fires of compassion. Now, what is the real problem here? Not knowing everything so that I can make an informed decision on who is right and who is wrong? Nope. The real problem is actually the "wall" I mentioned above. The wall was not created by circumstance, nor was it created by Satan (Satan merely wants to use it to his advantage). The wall was created rock by rock by every single piece of new information I received. It grew higher and higher as I tried to learn more and more of the situation and with Satan handing me the mortar every step of the way as I continued to build. The wall is not a wall of objectivity. The wall is a wall of suspicion. I do not need to try and stay on the wall. I need to get off of the wall and tear it down.

It's A Matter of Trust

What is really important here? Trust. Trust that God is ultimately in control and trust of one another. Perfect love outcasts fear. Suspicion is fear of being wronged, fear of being duped into believing something that is not true, and fear of being made to look like a fool. So after all is said and done, suspicion is not ultimately concerned so much with the person under suspicion as it is with ourselves - our own security, our own pride, and our own self-worth. We are really concerned about our rights to self protection and self dignity. Hmmmm - was Christ concerned about these things when he was wronged? Was Christ concerned about his dignity when he was spat upon? Was Christ concerned about self protection when he was crucified? Ultimately, what happens to us or to our church is in God's hands. If we do not believe this, no matter how bad the circumstances, then we are mistaken. Either God is working in our church or He is not. There are no other choices here.

God may be working to restore it. He may be working to refine it. Maybe God wants the church to grow. Maybe God wants the church to shrink. Maybe God wants the church to dissolve. I don't know the answers here, but I do know that my main concern should be with what God is trying to do and how I can be a part of that and that ultimately I should trust that God is in control even if I do not know all of the details or answers? Do we trust that God is in control? Do we trust that the leaders in our church are well meaning and trying to find God just as we are? Or do we believe in the infallibility of our leaders when we certainly do not believe that we ourselves are infallible? Do we believe that God can work out His plan regardless whether or not we make the right decisions? We supposedly believe this for our own personal lives, why is it hard for us to believe this for our church?

There is one more thing I know. Suspicion will absolutely destroy a church. I am not advocating blind faith of our leaders or other people, nor am I advocating never questioning our leaders as to their understanding of why certain decisions were made. But this can be done in an edifying way. There is nothing edifying about suspicion. And suspicion does not focus itself on decisions that were made, but rather focuses on the integrity of those making the decisions.

I repeat - suspicion will absolutely destroy a church.